Quotes from Love at Home: Insights from the Lives of Latter-day Prophets

Bruce R. McConkie taught that the Creation, the Fall, and the Atonement are the three pillars of eternity. Similarly, most marriages have their "three pillars" - a creation, a fall, and an atonement. The "creation" is the beginning of the relationship... But inevitably most marriages experience a "fall" - trials, adversity, challenges, and even fits of disenchantment.... When a husband and wife utilize Christ's gifts, and thereby become like Him because they live committed to Him, then the "atonement" stage of the marriage is realized. Their trials are less devastating, their love is more mature, and their unity is assured. They begin to see fewer flaws in their spouse, they are more forgiving of weaknesses, they are less prone to frustration, and the joy of the journey becomes surprisingly grand.

Marital partners begin as friends. And yet tragically, too many end their friendship when they begin their marriage. Among Latter-day Saints, such should never be the case. However, with the hustle and bustle of day-to-day living - getting an education, raising a family, earning an income, serving in the Church, maintaining a household, and running children from event to event - too many place their marriage on the back burner. Everything seems to get nurtured except the friendship that, prior to marriage, we did everything in our power to cultivate. Husbands and wives must place their marriage before any other earthly relationship or temporal thing. Ultimately, it must come before their relationship with other family members, before work, before leisure activities, before a calling; it must be second only to one's relationship with God. The neglected plant dies. And the neglected friendship does too.

We have been warned against the things of this world . . . But exactly what are the things of the world? An easy and infallible test has been given us in the well-known maxim "You can have anything in this world for money." If a thing is of this world, you can have it for money; if you cannot have it for money, it does not belong to this world. --Hugh Nibley

C. Terry Warner

In an age in which the religion of scapegoating seeks to turn many of us against our parents, the religion of Atonement calls us all to turn our hearts toward them, even in their weaknesses and sins.

Where scapegoating teaches us to refuse reconciling ourselves to those with whom we have been at odds, the Savior said that in order to come unto Him, we must first be reconciled to them.

He commands us, if we would be His and enjoy the peace that passes understanding, to become of one heart one with another, and He lives to help us do so.


What Christ endured is enough, and therefore we want for nothing.

[from the talk Why We Forgive]

Deliverance seems to pivot on our willingness to shed selfishness and summon the courage to give and extend charity.
Throughout our mortal journey with the Lord, we learn to love him by emulating him, and in the process we become love. If charity is the pure love of Christ, then we, like Christ whom we love, are charity . Elder Dallin H. Oakes said charity is not an act but what we become. And what we have become holds sufficient power to deliver us. --Larry Barkdull

And see that all these things are done in wisdom and order; for it is not requisite that a man should run faster than he has strength. And again, it is expedient that he should be diligent, that thereby he might win the prize; therefore, all things must be done in order.
--Mosiah 4:27

If then you are wise, you will show yourself rather as a reservoir than as a canal. A canal spreads abroad water as it receives it, but a reservoir waits until it is filled before overflowing, and thus without loss to itself [it shares] its superabundant water.
--Bernard of Clairvuex

A beautiful picture. The canal runs dry so quickly, shortly after the rains subside. Like a dry stream bed in the desert. But a reservoir is a vast and deep reserve of life. We are called to live in a way that we store up reserves in our heart, and then offer from a place of abundance. As Jesus said, “Therefore every teacher of the law who has been instructed about the kingdom of heaven is like the owner of a house who brings out of his storeroom new treasures as well as old” (Matt 13:52). I’m thinking, Storeroom? What storeroom? “The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart…for out of the overflow of his heart, his mouth speaks” (Luke 6:45).
I’m afraid I live spiritually like I live financially – I get a little, and go spend it. I live like a canal. I look like a reservoir when the rains come, but shortly after, I’m dried up again. (Many a Scrooge has filled his coffers while starving his soul).
“There are very many canals in the church today,” laments Julia Gatta, “but few reservoirs.” One woman deeply involved in ministry wrote to me recently that she is “burned out to a crackling crunch.” She has been a canal. She hasn’t cared for her heart. She is not alone.
--John Eldredge

Fathers and sons

The Book of Mormon contains several father-son encounters: Father Lehi with Laman, Lemuel, Sam, Nephi, Jacob, and Joseph; Alma the Elder and Mosiah with their sons; and Mormon and Moroni. But none is more soul-searching than the counsel given to Helaman, Shiblon, and Corianton by Alma. Each of these fathers, like Alma, had one thing in mind, the welfare of his children. Alma counseled his sons about physical and spiritual matters. He encouraged them to put their trust in God, to keep his commandments, to pray, to keep records, to be an example, and to teach the gospel to others. And, like the others, he blessed them.
Modern-day scripture instructs us to “set in order” our own homes (D&C 93:43.) Nothing is more beautiful than Mormon’s farewell to his son, Moroni. After instructing his faithful son one final time, Mormon, echoing the desire of every father, wrote, “Behold, my son, I recommend thee unto God.” (Moro. 9:22.)
-- Clark Johnson

Francis Frangipane

Rescue is the constant pattern of God’s activity.

Vicky Pahnke Taylor

Are there remarks, looks, or other offenses from others that stop us in our tracks and ruin our day? If so, we suffer doubly — and waste good time in which we could serve and be served, love and be loved, find joyfulness and offer it.
Just because someone makes an offense against us does not mean we have to take offense! In order to shore ourselves up and let the negative roll right off, here are a few ideas that may help:
• Those who love us are not concerned with what is on the outside nearly so much as what is on the inside.
• Fight back: Say something positive or loving to the offending party. It will stop them in their tracks as it allows us to move forward positively.
• No one can dictate our self-image. We do that. And leaning upon and trusting in the reality that we are made in the image of God will help us keep more positive!
• Build spiritual stuff. Remember that even the air we breathe is a loving loan from our Father. The temporal stuff really is not as important.
• Lots of times, people who treat others with rudeness or indifference are dealing with their own dark difficulties. Be the one to offer light to them.
• Find some thing positive to counteract the negativity. Scriptures, exercise, a small act of kindness to someone [yes, even when we really don’t feel like it] will help us even if it doesn’t help the other guy.

H. Wallace Goddard

If we take too much responsibility for our own improvement or fail to let Him reign, we make ourselves the gods of our lives.

The great danger of being talented is that we may almost be able to sustain the fiction that we are doing quite well. When we get humble, He can do miracles with us.

At a time of such moral confusion, Satan puts a magnifying glass to our misery; he magnifies foreboding, anxiety, and depression. In contrast Heavenly Father applies the Son to our challenges; when we feel His touch, all is love, joy, and peace.

When God knocks on our door, rather than hide, maybe we should take a deep breath, bow our heads, and run to Him.

Rummage around your soul for gratitude and see if joy is not the result.

I love this quote Catlin posted on her quote blog -

Our mother provides us with our first experience of nurturing. She is our first and most powerful female role model. It is from her that we learn what it is to be a woman...Our cells divided and grew to the beat of her heart. Our skin, hair, heart, lungs, and bones were nourished by her blood, blood that was awash with the neurochemicals formed in response to her thoughts, beliefs, and emotions. If she was fearful or anxious..., our bodies knew it. If she felt safe, happy, and fulfilled, we felt that too...Every daughter contains her mother and all the women who came before her. The unrealized dreams of our maternal ancestors are part of our heritage.
--Christiane Northrup M.D., Mother-Daughter Wisdom

I stand in the middle of my little circle of women: sometimes
the memory of my mother and aunts and the hopes for my
daughters and grandchildren are almost too much to bear.
I have hoped to heal the burdens and illnesses from the past,
but sometimes doubt I have the capacity or knowledge to do it.
I have hoped to pass on strength and happiness to my children,
but sometimes doubt I am the woman to do it. The moments
I feel capable of both are wonderful.

When one’s growth is presided over by One who is perfectly wise, perfectly loving, and perfectly committed to our well being, we may be fully confident. We may enjoy the peace of knowing that our limitations do not (cannot) put us beyond the reach of His saving power.
That Jesus who “is able to do his work,” testifies that “he doeth not anything save it be for the benefit of the world; for he loveth the world, even that he layeth down his own life that he may draw all men unto him” (2 Nephi 27:21, 26:24).
It won’t do to say we believe in Him while chafing and fidgeting against His purposes. To know Him is to trust Him.
Satan wants very much to keep us from the reassuring truth of God’s good will. That evil one knows that if we discover God’s desire to bless us, evil will lose its allure. --H. Wallace Goddard

The great danger of being talented is that we may almost be able to sustain the fiction that we are doing quite well. Jesus’ appreciation for the untalented, the sinners, and the cripples was more than compassion for their difficult plight; He cherished their humility. When we get humble, He can do miracles with us.
--Wallace Goddard

The line-upon-line principle

The Only Way to Get to the Next Line Is to Take the One We're on Seriously
To take it seriously means to take a serious look at ourselves and our hearts. King Benjamin calls this "an awful view" (Mosiah 3:25), and it can be awful, because when we take an honest look at our hearts, we often find things we aren't proud of and would just as soon ignore. Just as a good learner can manage to produce a grammatical sentence by sheer force of will and by heavy monitoring and managing of his tongue, we can, through force of will and effort, bring our gospel performance into line so that from the outside we are "in compliance" with all the rules. However, we know in our hearts that this is not enough. The Lord requires overt obedience, but that is only the beginning. The Lord also requires the heart. Throughout the scriptures He makes it perfectly clear that a gift hypocritically given is not counted as a gift. Sitting politely and looking spiritual in church is nice, but it doesn't make up for the cynical thoughts screaming through our heads about the bishop. The Lord doesn't just expect us to do our callings as if we had faith. He wants us to have the faith and act out of that faith. He doesn't just want us to behave toward people as if we loved them. We somehow or other need to actually learn to love them. Getting these principles into our hearts is not easy, and working on them is not necessarily a direct process; but taking the process seriously at a minimum requires us to take an honest look at ourselves, recognize where we are now, and figure out what line we're on. (Br. Dilworth Parkinson)

Heber C. Kimball

“I am perfectly satisfied that my Father and my God is a cheerful, pleasant, lively, and good-natured Being. Why? Because I am cheerful, pleasant, lively, and good-natured when I have his Spirit. That is one reason why I know; and another is ― the Lord said, through Joseph Smith, ‘I delight in a glad heart and a cheerful countenance.’ That arises from the perfection of his attributes; he is a jovial, lively person, and a beautiful man.”

In the corporate world, when business gets tough, they start talking lots about profit centers. Every department has to make money ― be a profit center. It becomes the mantra.
"But God doesn’t see us as profit centers. We are not little factories that must make a net profit. We are His children. He expects to lose money on every single one of us every day of our lives. He is okay with that. He has already set in store an infinite and eternal Atonement ― so there is nothing we can do that will tax His resources. He has us covered." --Wallace Goddard

How much larger your life would be if you could become smaller in it. . . You would begin to be interested in others. You would break out of this tiny. . . theatre in which your own little plot is always being played, and you would find yourself under a freer sky, in a street full of splendid strangers. --G. K. Chesterton

Abraham and Isaac

Josephus records these words by Abraham:
"My child, having asked with myriad prayers from God that you be born to me, when you came into life, there is nothing that I did not take trouble with regard to your upbringing, nor was there anything that I thought would bring me greater happiness than if I should see you grown to manhood and when I died, I should have you as the successor of my realm.
But since it was by God's wish that I became your father and again since, as it seems best to Him, I give you up, bear this consecration nobly, for I concede you to God, who requires now to obtain this honor from us, in return for the fact that He has been a benevolent helper and ally to me.
Since you were born out of the course of nature, depart now from life not in a common fashion but sent forth by your own father to God, the father of all, by the rite of sacrifice. I think that He has judged that you are deserving to be removed from life neither by disease nor by war nor by some other of the afflictions that are conditioned by nature to befall humanity, but that He would receive your soul with prayers and sacrificial rites and would keep it near Himself.
And you will be a guardian for me and supporter in my old age, wherefore also I especially reared you, by offering me God in place of yourself."
(Judean Antiquities 1.228–31, in Feldman, Josephus, 90–92.)

How delightful is the company of generous people, who overlook trifles and keep their minds instinctively fixed on whatever is good and positive in the world about them. People of small caliber are always carping. They are bent on showing their own superiority, their knowledge or prowess or good breeding. But magnanimous people have no vanity, they have no jealousy, and they feed on the true and the solid wherever they find it. And, what is more, they find it everywhere. --Van Wyck Brooks

Wallace Goddard

But we do not fret about [God] forgetting us. This is the point [He] seems to be making when He tells us that we are written in the palms of His hands. He is no more likely to forget us than a mother will forget her cherished newborn (Isaiah 49:16).
He loves us. He has committed all the resources of heaven and earth to help us grow. When we, like a pouting 5-year-old, threaten to run away from home, He does not accuse us of ingratitude and throw us out. Rather He waits at the gate. He comes looking for every one that is lost from the flock.
In some sense all of us are prodigals. We have all run from our obligations. We all have squandered our time and talents in wasteful living. (Think of watching television all evening, night after night!) Eventually the dull aching in our souls makes us long for something better. We think about our better lives with Father. When we have done nothing more than turn toward Home, He runs, falls on our necks, and kisses us.

Feels good

As Elder Jeffrey R. Holland said in his masterful address "Cast Not Away Therefore Your Confidence":
The …lesson from the Lord's spirit of revelation in the miracle of crossing the Red Sea is that along with the illuminating revelation that points us towards a righteous purpose or duty, God will also provide the means and power to achieve that purpose. Trust in that eternal truth. If God has told you something is right, if something is indeed true for you, He will provide the way for you to accomplish it.
Quoting from the Doctrine and Covenants, he says, 'Therefore, let not your hearts faint ... Mine angels shall go up before you, and also my presence, and in time ye shall possess the goodly land.'
Elder Holland tells us what the "goodly land" is:
Your promised land. Your new Jerusalem. Your own little acre flowing with milk and honey. Your future. Your dreams. Your destiny ("Cast Not Away Therefore Your Confidence," BYU Devotional Address, 2 Mar 1999).

When disappointment and discouragement strike

In the gospel of Jesus Christ you have help from both sides of the veil and you must never forget that. When disappointment and discouragement strike - and they will - you remember and never forget that if our eyes could be opened we would see horses and chariots of fire as far as the eye can see riding at reckless speed to come to our protection. They will always be there, these armies of heaven, in defense of Abraham's seed. (Jeffrey R. Holland)

Now - here is my secret:

I tell it to you with an openness of heart that I doubt I shall ever achieve again, so I pray you are in a quiet room as you hear these words. My secret is that I need God - that I am sick and can no longer make it alone. I need God to help me give, because I no longer seem capable of giving; to help me be kind, as I no longer seem capable of kindness; to help me love, as I seem beyond being able to love.
(Douglas Coupland in Life After God)